Turning 7

Our beautiful big girl

My little girl is growing up.  She turned 7 yesterday, and I cant help feeling old when I say where has the time gone, but truly it feels like we blinked and our baby is 7.  Seven feels like such a big kid number, I wish we could slow down time for just a little while so we can simply enjoy Kaylie in the here and now.  We feel so blessed to have such an amazing kid.  I know we're probably biased, but she just brings so much joy to everyone she meets.  She doesnt have a mean bone in her body, and she is so compassionate.  I know some adults who could take lessons from her.  I remember the first time I looked down at her, it was like my life suddenly had such a greater purpose.  I no longer was just living for me, but had this beautiful life to love, protect and nurture,  It's so neat to see things from your children's point of view, everything seems brighter, and new again.  I hope we can hold onto her sweet innocence for as long as possible. 

walking with sissy (yaya)

Kaylie said to me the other day, "when I wish on my birthday candles, I'm going to wish Alexa wasnt sick."  Thank you Kaylie for giving your wish to your little sister.  She's been concerned about Alexa's death lately.  I dont know what she has heard to question things or if it is just a feeling she has.  She told my mom the other day I wish Alexa wasnt sick but at least she isnt dead.  She's asked me a few times why do kids die?  I dont really know how to answer these things with out scaring her more.  My mom believes we should discuss the possibility with her.  I think we'll hold off for a little while.  We have talked to her about Alexa losing the ability to walk, and needing a wheel chair in the future.  She understands that.  Now when she meets someone she says this is my sister, she has a tube in her belly cause she cant eat and one day she wont be able to walk.  I think it's just her way of making it make sense to herself.

On a different note things are feeling a little better from the last time.  I dont know what it is really, because nothings really changed.  Maybe it's the fact that I got more than 3 hours sleep last night... We're at my parents house yet again.  We're looking at houses and apartments this weekend, and then Kay's party is this weekend.  Hopefully we find something.  We looked at an apartment in Fall River yesterday.  Gorgeous inside, but I'm unsure if its doable for us.  I dont know how I feel living in the city...  We have some more to look at today and tomorrow, so something will have to turn up. 

I see you

Alexa has had a rough few days.  Four days ago she started having horrible diarrhea, and almost instantly she developed a terrible rash.  So uncomfortable, poor kid.  She now has prescription cream.  Hopefully that works.The diarrhea on the hand is a major concern.  She becomes dehydrated so easily.  Her GI doctor would like us to slow her feeds down to what it was before, and go in and get stool cultures.  She's lost a bit of weight, and she cant afford to lose anymore.  Im just hoping we dont have to go get her some IV fluids.  She's at least not crying in constant pain right now.  She still has a quite a bit of discomfort, but she is able to tolerate more.  We had a few really good hours with her this morning. 

I've been such a scatterbrain lately.  I misplaced my debit card, and I keep forgetting simple things.  I need to keep a constant list going of things I need to do.  I'll start doing something and half way through get distracted, and then never come back to it.  Very frustrating.  Especially since Im stuck at my parents house with no car and no money.  Fun times...  Kev comes tomorrow, so I can hold out till then.  Just hopefuly Alexa isnt going to need to get admitted.

Visiting Jake

Kaylie's party is on Sunday... Chuck E Cheese  ane specially special treat for our amzing little girl.  We wanted to make this birthday a little more special because her year has been so bad.  She doesnt know yet, as it's a surprise.  I cant wait to see her face when she sees we're all going to Chuck e cheese.  One quick Alexa story before we go.  We visited Jake (the horse) when we went to my parents house.  As soon as Alexa saw him she started signing dog.  As we got closer her eyes kept getting bigger.  She was amazed by the biggest dog she has ever seen.  I kept trying to show her the sign for horse but she was insistent that he was a dog.  She watched him for almost half an hour.  Love it....